Thursday, April 2, 2009

OMG! I'm 40!



Today.....


yesterday...

OMG! When did that happen??
Seems like it was just yesterday that I was 20...
Of course..not really...
That was actually Three Children,
and two grandchildren ago....(wow)

To be honest, I am in a little bit of a funk today...
I know that 40 is just a number,
but still.....

I have been a little frustrated with some things in my life lately
which have contributed to my "funk"

I am not satisfied with where my spiritual life is....
I do not read my Bible or pray NEAR as much as I should or need too...
I used to be more heavily involved in ministry,
and I miss it.
I am also annoyed with myself for certain personality traits which always seem to get the better of me...
As Paul said...
"15I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do."
I am concerned about my children...
two in particular...
and
I am angry that I am never able to see my grandchildren,
even though they live three blocks from me.

I am wanting to go to school, but know that at the moment it is unrealistic for me,
and I am wanting to buy a house...
and considering the state of the economy
and the fact I am staying home
....that is also unrealistic at the moment....

Now...after that list of complaints...
I do have some things I am very happy about...

I love my family, and although I never pictured myself having five kids
they are my greatest accomplishment.
I think it was the best decision my hubby and I ever made
to have Jeremy and Gracie
even when the others were out of the house.
I am also grateful that although finances are pretty tight,
I have been able to stay home with my babies...


I love my husband....
He is patient with me despite my many faults...
and I am glad that we are still friends after all these years.'

I am thankful with the house we live in now...
It is in a great neighborhood, with a huge backyard
and our rent is really low,
in a time when everyone else is paying over 1000 a month...

I know that happiness is really a choice..
and so
I choose today to be happy.
because despite some of the bad in my life,
the good things are really good.

So here is to the next 40 years...
may they be filled with God, Love, Family and Happiness...