Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Now what do we do..that baby is gone....

First of all, I would just like to thank all of you who had words of condolence for Kendal and I after this last miscarriage...
I am doing better now...sort of....
I am done with the miscarriage...
I have to go in for more blood work to make sure my hcg levels are back to normal...
Emotionally...well....I guess we will deal with that.

My point for telling people about the miscarriages is to get women talking about it.
It is a really touchy subject...

For those of us who have miscarried..as one woman put it to me recently...
"It's like those babies didn't exsist...
no one wants to talk about it.." Her baby was in the second trimester.

I myself have friends who when I miscarried...completely avoided the subject..
never asked me how I was..or how I was dealing with it.
It left me feeling very angry, and alone.
...and also like i really didn't have any friends....
I am very fortunate to have a husband who stands by me,
and grieved with me.

There are also those who just don't get it...
I was told once last year... "Well, at least you have some healthy children..."
Don't get me wrong... I am VERY thankful that I have been fortunate enough to have children...'
but that doesn't lessen the pain of losing the one you are carrying...

I have many friends...but if one of them dies...I don't rejoice that I still have many who are alive..
I grieve for the one who died...

Sometimes the medical community isn't very sensitive about it either..
I know a lady who had a miscarriage about the same time as me..
The doctor asked her what she was crying about anyways...
after all..she was only five weeks along....
(I should add however, that my doctor was amazing...
she has been extremely supportive, and also ordered tests
to see why this happened...I am so glad to have a doctor who
doesn't just consider me a number...)

So again...I thank those of you who sorrowed with us...
I may not have responded well... but I really did appreciate it...
we are doing much better...

So.... What to do now...

Well...
I have decided that if nothing else, this loss has indicated to me that my body needs some changes...
so I will be changing some massive things in my diet
and hopefully also getting into some kind of more regular excercise program.
When I was tested it was determined that I was low on iron...
and also folic acid...
I suspect I also am having trouble with my Progestrone levels...
And since Progestrone controls all aspects of a womans health..
I will also be checking into that one as well...
I will be sharing some of those changes in the next while...

In the meantime... Please feel free to comment,
share your experience, or your healthy ideas...
Also feel free to tweet this, or link to it on facebook...


blessings... Have a great day!

3 comments:

Rose said...

sorry re the miscarriage. i had a family member who had a miscarriage. it's a death and needs to be grieved. sitting and talking with someone is important so it's not just avoided, that's so lonely. i will keep you in my prayers. rose

Teresa Dawn said...

Sorry to hear about the miscarriage :(

Peggy said...

Robyn,
I just catching up on your posts--sorry but my life has been going in all directions lately and hopefully will fall back in place soon:)
I am so sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I too had one between my first and second child and was so sad...You are right, people don't talk about it much and back then-35 years ago, there wasn't the internet or anywhere to get any information at all. It was a hard time but I have come to understand that it truly is God's way of telling us that something, for whatever reason, just didn't hook up right. And through that I have become even more amazed and grateful for the miracle of babies...
Hugs, Peggy